April 17, 2010

Twisted Road in Life

Have you looked at me

questioning the life i lead

my secess, goals reached or

the loss of dreams insted

smiles, fun and the laughter

from the things i tried

loss,despair,loneliness,and worry

filled the tears i cried

choices, moments, my paths taken

i wish i could change

yet, at that moment was

the only choice i could arrange

the joy of being someones

mother, friend, and wife

as i walk the path

in my twisted road in life.



April 17, 2010


After looking you in the eye

I question was I right or wrong

to keep this important secret

from you for so long

If I explained to you

would you see my side

or turn away from me

with too many unanswered whys

would you even consider

my inexperience,fear, and youth

or would you be mad

because I choose to hide the truth

Reveal the truth to you

is what my heart shouts

if I take this chance

will acceptance come about?


April 17, 2010


At first I questioned

What did I do,or say

To make you choose

To hurt me this way

No answers will ever come

To my questions, ” why”

But I refuse to give you power

Over the tears in my eyes

Common sense tells me

That this wasn’t my fault

I was a victim in the

Violence and power you sought

I can’t let my life

Be consumed by your actions

I have to mentally heal

Learn to control my reactions

Not saying I will forgive

Or that I will soon forget

Because now I’m a changed person

From the moment we met

Me, my Reason

April 16, 2010

Did you ever wonder
want to know me
just read my poems
my emotions youll see
some are made up
others for entertainment to
while others from the heart
emotions open for you
do you ever read them
have you ever cared
poems revealing when i feel
hurts, loneiness, and scared
my emotions written down
for you to read
if you ever wanted
to get to know me.


i’m not a great poet
only words from my heart
hope to convince abused persons
to find a new start

when reading these different poems
do you recognize anyone
you, me , neighbor, friend
daughter, mother, father, son?

if it is really true
if that is the case
please help them get to
a safer place

Lost Dreams

April 16, 2010

Battered wife

I’m standing looking in the mirror
She’s not there anymore I fear…
The young girl with the dreams
Of first kiss, being loved, many things…
Meeting him, love at first sight,
Being kissed under the star light…
Weekend nights shared partying with friends
Disagreeing with boyfriend, then making amends…
Finally getting license, then first car
Getting job, money to drive afar…
Learning about nature, traveling the earth
Learn to skydive, even to surf…
Smiling and laughing, planning dream wedding,
Exchanging vows at the perfect setting…
News of baby brings such happiness 
Doesn’t mind body changes, hair a mess…
Comforted in her husbands devoted love
Feeling she’s blessed from heaven above…
That’s not me, not my life
Instead I became a battered wife…

my poetry

April 16, 2010

my poetry is the inner part of myself, although some may not underrstand them, shrug after reading them, its my heart, my emotions crying out to be heard, be acknowledged.  I share my poems with my children, yet they dont understand the need, the drive that makes me want to share them with others. Maybe thats good. That they dont understand abuse. My writting is simple, so most people can understand and to tell the truth, because i quit school in 8th grade when i became a teen mother. Later i got my diploma, then some college, but the years lost, in general spelling and reading, makes me a horriable speller. although im good at making excuses, i was in a hurry writting this…or i type it wrong…smile. you get use to hiding things sometimes to well. I created this blog so i can express and share my poems with someone who has the misforune of understanding abuse. I was goings to the womans resource center in winona minnesota, they suggested writting down your abuse as a form to outlet if your unable to tell your story, so most credit should go to them.

heres my first poem i wrote about abuse

All these thing you’ve given to me
Bruises, Marks,
Screams, Hurts,
Unfounded Accusations…
Total isolation…
Threats, Terror,
Nightmares, tears,
Emotional High…
Worried I’ll die…
Low self-esteem,
Hurtful remarks,
Unwanted lust…
Slaps, Mistrust…
Broken bones,
Hitting, Pushing,
Shoving, Fighting…
Endless lying…
Humiliation, Misuse,
Emotional abuse,
No Friends, No family, No Help
Is this really what love is?